I’m still beating myself up over my apparent weight loss plateau. Its going on 5 weeks of weighing 200 lbs. My poor husband has had to listen to be complain day in and day out, I’m sure he’s ready to hit me over the head with a frying pan. You guys are probably tired of hearing about it too!
So I’ve decided to focus on the other things, the good things that have been happening in the last 4 months, the small victories if you will.
-SIZE 8! I know you’ve heard it before, but I’m wearing a fricken’ size 8 in jeans!
-No holes left in my belt! I now have to wear said size 8 jeans with a belt! I’m wearing my belts on the very last hole. Actually I’m currently wearing a belt that two years ago Blake poked two extra holes in for me, when I was my smallest. I’m on that last hole he made. My other belt is loose on the last hole, so I should have him add some more holes in that one too.
-I’ve become a runner again. Yesterday I ran 7.5 miles at 10:03mins/mile pace. Just the thought of that puts a huge smile on my face!
-I bought a bikini last month. The fact that I was even willing to buy one is a huge difference, I’m very self conscious about my body, especially in a swimming suit. I’ve been taking pictures of myself in my swimsuit every month to use as motivation and today I took another picture and put it side by side to last month. While there are no amazing changes there are definitely slight little differences that I am proud of: my belly is a little flatter, my legs look more muscular, less armpit fat, my face is a lot thinner, my butt is smaller. Those kinds of things add up.
-I like the way I look more and more each day. I don’t see a double chin first thing when I look in the mirror, I see the definition in my collar bones and cheek bones. I feel my hip bones when I lay on my tummy, I can feel the strong muscles in my legs. In high school I was very aware of my muscular legs, I hated them. But now look what they can do!
I’ve got to change up my thinking a little bit and start to realize that the number on scale isn’t the most important. The number on my pants tag, the pace of my mile, the level confidence I have those are the things that are important to me. I wouldn’t want to weigh 150 lbs and not be able to run a block.
I need to be thinking about why I want to be skinner? So other people think I look good? Not really, its so I think look good. Well, I can tell you right now that I feel the sexiest after I just ran 7 miles and I walk in the door and tell Blake how fast I ran. The pride I feel after I pushed myself harder than ever, that’s sexy to me. And worth more than a lower number on the scale.