The Struggle

I’ve been struggling to get a post out lately. I’ve started a few and then I get sidetracked and by the time I come back to it, nothing I’ve written makes sense.

Everyday is a mix between disappointment, stress, and excitement. Most of the time I feel completely overwhelmed.

I don’t know how to live balanced.

We finally starting moving this weekend, I wanted to start moving las weekend. There is still too much to do, and we have to be done by Saturday, preferably Friday. My husband decided to take today off, so he could move he big stuff with a buddy, but his uncle is still doing some renovating on the new place. Which means the kitchen is tore apart, the living room is full of venting stuff so there is no room to put the big stuff like the couches. The most time consuming will be moving the garage, but we have to wait on that because they are storing equipment and supplies in the new garage. It’s so insanely stressful, that I hate to even think about it.

Luckily, I have my sister and best friend coming over on Thursday to help me do cleaning and preparation of the old place. Aren’t they wonderful?

On the health front, things are not quite perfect. I decided to take last week off from running because my knee was bothering me so much. I took a few walks, but not as many as I’d like to have taken. I’m working 8 hour shifts right now and by the time I actually get home I’m exhausted, so I take a nap then work on moving. I know that plenty of people work full time and still get in their workouts. I’ve done it myself, but when you are used to work 5 hours a day, it’s an adjustment. I’m also getting up at 4 am, and not sleeping terribly well. I only have one day left, then I can get back to my regular sleep habits.

I’m most disappointed in my food choices. I need to be eating healthy, I need to be getting vitamins and nutrients galore. I can’t believe the things I’ve been eating lately. I need to be maintaining my weight, according to myfitnesspal that means like 2080 calories, which seriously scares me. I feel like I will gain if I eat that much. But with all the junk and fast food I have been eating, I’m probably going to gain anyway. In the last two weeks, my weight had fluctuated between 200 to 196.

I need to get under control. Now.

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